>.<'' VENT [X rated with curse words a lot, just a heads up]

I... Am.... So...... Fucking...... Pissed...

My mom is such a fucking bitch. I hate her I hate her I hate her. Go crawl in your little fucking hole mom and stay there.

I love how my mom is so fucking stupid that she bows to her husbands feet and kisses his feet all because she is afraid he will divorce her. Well in my opinion IT WOULD BE BETTER IF HE FUCKING DID. She gives him the power for whatever the fuck he wants. If he doesn't want me to do something then I can't fucking do it. Because HE doesn't want me to. Uhm hello sir you are NOT my father. You did NOT give me life. So you have NO right to fucking take my life away and tell me what I can't do.

I am ideally a great child according to everybody. I don't fucking do drugs, I don't sneak out late at night, I don't drink, don't smoke, I am still a virgin for fucks sake I am 17 and I think that is good cause at least I am not going around and getting pregnant like almost everyone else at my school. I spend most of my time fucking babysitting my sisters. 17 Years old and my life is dedicated to babysitting so I have nothing else to do isn't that great. It is wonderfuckingful you should try it sometime.

I seriously fucking love how Ray tells me that I wear too much makeup sometimes cause I like to put a lot of eyeliner on sometimes. Uhm HellfuckingO kids my age do that. People not my age do that. Shut the fuck up and get over it sir. At least I am not caking every little thing considered make up on. Fucking a.

Okay here is the reason I am pissed at this very moment people. I wanted my friend Desiree to come over but NOOOO. My 'parents' if you can even call them that. Their parenting skills suck more dick than a whore. But nope she can't why is this? Because they want to shit all over my fucking rainbow. They made up excuses like 'It is too last minute' and 'The house is a mess'. THE HOUSE IS ALWAYS A FUCKING MESS WHAT IS NEW. My parents room are fucking dirty 24/7 unless aliens pop down from the sky and steal the shit they leave off their floor. Yet they have the fucking nerve to tell everyone else to clean up. They are more fucking lazy than I am!

I have done shit for them every fucking day. Babysitting my sisters, cooking dinner cause mr. twinkie is too fat and lazy to even bother finishing it, a whole bunch of fucking shit. I EVEN gave up my room. My little room that was all mine. So Jordan can move in with me in that room cause it is too fucking crowded in Kayla and Kirstens room. Who in their fucking right mind would let their preteen sister move into their room by volunteer? Me. Cause I did it for her and everybody else.

But fuck no I can't even have a friend spend the night. Cause the house is a mess and Ray thinks this house is an monarchy and he is hitler or the spawn of jesus even. It is not fucking fair.

So this is how much my life sucks right now. Let us go over key points. My Dad acts like he barely even cares about my existance, My step dad thinks he can RULE my existance, my mom is just a fucking asshole who doesn't give a shit less about me. Or at least she is a great actress at it she should try to get in a movie as a self centered whore! I get to share a room with my ADHD/Autistic sister. Yay for me. My Dad is fading away. We hardly ever have money. My years of high school is ending which is good and bad. Good bye childhood. Hello fucking real world. Maybe if I am lucky the first second I step into the real world a train will derail and hit me or something. Only if I am lucky. I pretty much narrowed down that I have Depression and BiPolar disorder. I hate my life I hate my life I hate my life. The end period caplow. I know I have Depression from researching it and before I was having suicidal thoughts so yay for me. Something else is fucking wrong with me woopdedamndoo. Fuck I need Psychological help or something before I become some mass murderer or something.

Oh by the way George and I got back together. Which is good. Wow stop the tape something good is going on for once.